by PlaguePJP
White Boy Voodoo title card.
Special Containment Procedures:
SCP-XXXX.
Description: SCP-XXXX is a dung beetle that was once Randall "Randoo" Dawson, host of the interstitial television show White Boy Voodoo, which aired on MTV between 2003 and 2004.
White Boy Voodoo were disconnected episodes ranging from five to ten minutes long, meant to be played before the 11 PM programming block began. The episodes focused on Dawson and his activities as a practitioner of "voodoo." The practices depicted in White Boy Voodoo bore little, if any, resemblance to the genuine traditions of Haitian Vodou or Louisiana Voodoo, instead focusing on the aesthetics, outdated stereotypes, and familiar tropes of occult horror that American popular culture has projected onto the religion.
While communication with SCP-XXXX is not feasible, analysis of the White Boy Voodoo archive has concluded that Dawson was a low-level reality bender. Interviews with his parents suggest that his anomalous abilities began to manifest during his early teenage years, a period which was marked by an interest in horror films, the various shock jocks of the time, and a fascination with occult religions. As mentioned, the practices presented in White Boy Voodoo are inconsistent with the authentic beliefs. However, Dawson did display vague knowledge of various figures within Vodou and would "call upon them" during his episodes.
Addendum XXXX.1:
Recovered promotional poster.
Prior to the creation of this file, archival footage of White Boy Voodoo was not publicly available. According to the MTV archive, only a single episode of the show aired (see below), despite twenty-four segments being prepared for future broadcasts. Foundation webcrawlers discovered some discussion on early internet forums, though the show's anomalous qualities went unnoticed by these users. Most commentary focused on the "special effects," which were widely regarded as poor, even by the standards of the time and the assumed production budget of an interstitial television show.
The Foundation became involved with White Boy Voodoo on July 8th, 2007, following the upload of its only known episode onto YouTube. The upload triggered minor anomalous phenomena, including the spontaneous appearance of dung beetles in viewers’ peripheral vision and, in rare cases, the odor of burning sulfur. The video was subsequently removed, and an investigation into Viacom International Inc. was initiated.
A Foundation shell company attempted to contact Viacom under the pretense of purchasing archival footage and the White Boy Voodoo brand. The company returned with a denial of the show’s existence. Despite this, Foundation social engineers, alongside a memeticist, secured a meeting with MTVs Senior Vice President of Programming, Shane Steichen, to recover any remaining footage and gather testimony regarding the show’s creation, production, and reception.
Episode Title: Hex and the City
Synopsis: Randoo is seated in a wooden canoe floating in the Atchafalaya Basin. There are aggressively loud bug noises present throughout the entire segment. He announces the location as “Ho City, Population Two,” and introduces a blow-up sex doll named Britney, dressed in a red latex bodysuit resembling Britney Spears’ outfit from the Oops!… I Did It Again music video.
Randoo grabs a jar labeled “PIG BLOOD (REAL)” from a fishing bait cooler, proceeding to fingerpaint a "vee vee"1 on the doll's breasts and forehead. While rubbing the doll's temples, Randoo chants in vaguely French gibberish. The doll abruptly deflates before a loud pop and bubbling are heard. In place of the doll, a hyper-realistic silicone mannequin of Jessica Simpson appears. Randoo turns to the camera and states, “Guess that’s what I get for using pig’s blood.”
TRANSCRIPT
NAME: I appreciate you taking the time to meet with me today, Mr. Steichen.
Steichen: The thanks is all mine. I just couldn't say no to this opportunity.
NAME: I'm sure. So, I'm here to discuss Randall Dawson. Remember him?
Steichen: How could I forget? He was a character, to say the least.
NAME: What brought him and MTV together?
Steichen: Jackass had just wrapped its final episodes; we wanted something that had a similar energy to that but was cheaper to produce, mainly on the insurance end. This kid had been sending us tapes of him making weed magically appear in his bong — shit like that — for years. We gave him a shot, and it ended up working out.
NAME: As successful as Jackass?
Steichen: No, but I don't think anything could've been that successful. It was a comedy show to replace another comedy show. It did its job.
NAME: Compared to Jackass, I'd say the comedy of //White Boy Voodoo/ to be on an entirely different part of the spectrum. What did you think made it funny?
Steichen: I found it to be a searing satire.
NAME: Of?
Steichen: Well, the culture of the time. Stereotypes. All that. You know he was part Creole, Dawson?
NAME: I haven't read that anywhere. I spoke with his parents, and they didn't mention it.
Steichen: That's what we were told.
NAME: Did you follow up on that? He's from Wisconsin.
Steichen: I like to trust my talent.
NAME: Do you think this show was respectful?
Steichen: In what way?
NAME: To the culture it was drawing inspiration from.
Steichen: MTV has always strived to represent diverse cultures with authenticity and respect.. If you're asking me if I'd air it today, the answer is no.
NAME: Why air it back then?
Steichen: At the time, it was a parody of cultural appropriation, not actual cultural appropriation. You have to remember, this was post-Chappelle Show, pre-cancel culture. We wanted to be ahead of the curve.
Episode Title: Swamp Pope
Synopsis: Episode begins in New Orleans, but jumps from various locations in southern Louisiana. Randoo trawls Bourbon Street in a full ghillie suit, a homemade Papal mitre, and a golden curtain rod. Throughout the episode, he yells “SWAMP POPE!” at increasing volume and frequency while aggressively “blessing” tourists. Notable activities include:
- Pranking tourists, mainly by transfiguring their food into rodents and reptiles;
- Canonizing a homeless man, who proceeds to glow and float;
- Throwing a chicken foot at a rack of novelty license plate key chains, changing all the wording on them to various curse words;
- Whispering "swamp pope" at an alligator, until it repeated it back;
- Leading a crowd in prayer for Christina Aguilera to "get really fat;"
- Animating and then fighting a street performer's cello;
TRANSCRIPT
NAME: These were the first two episodes?
Steichen: Yep.
NAME: Hot start. Was the reaction positive?
Steichen: It was clearly what the viewers demanded. The reaction was insane. Internet forums exploded. We saw a 23% spike in the 18–24 male market for the SWAMP POPE rerun the next night. My son said every kid in his frat couldn't stop screaming "SWAMP POPE."
NAME: You use that term 'demand.' What do you mean?
Steichen: There's this quote I think about a lot. I think it was Henry Ford; it was one of the early car manufacturers for sure. He said, "If I asked people what they wanted, they'd tell me a faster horse." Randall was tapping into the chaotic energy that would come to define YouTube, and I'm not even sure he knew it.
NAME: And yet, you wouldn't air it today.
Steichen: Do you think Grumpy Cat would do well today?
NAME: Probably not, no. That's apples to oranges, though.
Steichen: How so? This was organic engagement to viral content from an audience that wanted it. We didn’t create demand — we met it where it lay.
NAME: Were there any issues? Howard Stern got punched around by the FCC for years. I have to assume a television show of this nature would get it worse.
Steichen: Back then, nobody was saying this stuff was off-limits. If they were, it was drowned out by viewership.
NAME: Internally, then. No one had any problems?
Steichen: I mean, there were some comments from legal and HR. A couple of interns refused to work on it.
NAME: I've read a document where issues of potential litigation were marked as low priority.
Steichen: I remember that. You can't sue someone over how they depict a religion. That's freedom of speech. We were pushing boundaries. That's the job of art. These two were the only ones to air. It was an experiment. It worked, and it informed us.
NAME: So, there were no issues from anyone who mattered?
Steichen: People just wanted to laugh. We provided that opportunity to them. I don't know what happened, but no one’s allowed to laugh anymore.
Episode Title: Spirit Nuggets
Synopsis: Randoo introduces "Vinny the Spirit Guy," a shirtless, overweight, intellectually disabled man painted like a skeleton, wearing a warped stovepipe hat with googly eyes glued to it. Vinny is described as Randoo's “high-weight medium with low IQ.” The pair sits in a dark room, lit only by a semicircle of red candles. Randoo claims Vinny can communicate with spirits through the ingestion of “spirit nuggets,” which are aquarium gravel stuffed in clear pill capsules.2
Vinny happily swallows the first capsule. Within seconds, he begins sobbing and clutching his left arm, which cleanly detaches at the shoulder and lands with a thud. Randoo laughs loudly, causing the candle flames to grow, illuminating floating skulls in the background that laugh with him. Pointing and giggling, Randoo proclaims, "he's possessed by the pain loa!"
TRANSCRIPT
Steichen: What do you want me to say? I can't defend this one — or any of it. This never got past the editors, let alone got to the air. This whole got to be enough.
NAME: How did it even happen?
Steichen: We didn't like constraing
Episode Title: Magic in the Hood
Synopsis: Randoo stands in an inner city Neighborhood of Louisiana, wearing a Dashiki3 and a large black wig in the style of an afro. The camera cuts to various African American men and women walking down the street as Randoo declares he's developed the courage to enter the "urban swamp foretold by the ancestors." He reveals several “gris-gris bags” and states that he's gonna "bless the block." A short segment ensues, where Randoo runs up to various people of African descent, opens his bags, and tosses whatever item was in there at them. These included:
- Shea butter;
- Pork Rinds;
- Condoms;
- Cotton Balls;
- A picture of Colonel Sanders.
Throughout the entire segment, Vinny The Spirit Guy follows Randoo, in no clothes save for a pair of white underwear, haphazardly painted brown.
Randoo is then seen on a basketball court, spray painting another "vee vee." He tosses two packages of menthol cigarettes and a picture of Dave Chappelle into it, causing smoke to billow from the symbol. Suddenly, children are heard hurling insults at Randoo, who quickly runs away, before slipping, falling, and screaming, “I did it for the culture!”
https://openverse.org/search/image?q=voodoo+skull&license=pdm,cc0,by,by-sa
https://openverse.org/image/c951e85a-0dc8-407f-bc41-908879a4674f?q=skeleton+doodle&p=8
https://openverse.org/image/e425cc07-ac81-46a6-80be-9d5b2bc0b8ed?q=skeleton+art&p=31
https://openverse.org/image/603e23dc-9ab9-4c8d-8b67-1d81800455b5?q=voodoo+doll&p=73
https://www.flickr.com/photos/robotclaw/3582306836/in/photolist-6syg1Y-65978k-j6YpA-d8X7n-4Ja7sP-4CWJrD-4Jegks-4Jekao-4Jemho-4Ja5Rn-4JekXL-4PaHJw-4PaJfo-5pTLsN-4JekzU-4P6trK-4Ja3dk-81mEra-4JeiF3-4PaJ6E-4Ja5GP-7ZqzuM-5pTLFW-7ZcvyZ-6su5vH-4JehQA-6su596-4JemrY-4P6tve-6sydZb-4Jehz5-6jRb7n-6su5JX-37SPtE-6su5Ut-6su6x6-4Jei7S-6syfzw-6su6sB-6syfTC-5yD941-6jVmqE-6syfhC-4Jem8S-4Ja4F8-6jVAQH-5NJdtU-568NvR-5yyPGP-5yD8Vj
https://openverse.org/image/01c79213-266f-47de-9d08-e070001d451e?q=skull+clipart&p=10
https://openverse.org/image/e89ae8e3-8296-44c1-8ee4-9362a14ef789?q=dung+beetle&p=14